nak tulis apa dow!!!

Erm..... idea2!!!! ok... start with me.. ari nie, takder yang istimewa.. bgn pg, kmas umah, kuar g breakfast n tgk tv... ya ampun membosankan!!!! sabar anis... tak lama lagi, kau akan rasa idop blajar blik... erm.. aku tnggu msj dia... ya ALLAH... pnyalah lama,.... lama gler mandi.. entah mndi, entah main air... nak kaco tkot kna marah... aku marah gler!!!!!! tapi takper.. aku bleh sabar kan?? aku kan kuat.... aku kan tabah.. aku tak kisah.. nak buat, buatlah... juz engat... what goes around comes around.. tu jer... aku ngh tnggu smthing nie... mntak2 lah dpat.... tu jer harapan aku... n aku pn dah dapat tau yang one of my friend dah hepi ngn owng yang baru... ha6..... she hepi, i'm hepi... aku syang dia.... syang sngat... tapi bwat masa nie, aku nak bg masa pada dia... biar dia fhm... n biar aku juga faham.. mngkin dia bosan n rimas... yelah.. aku tak sudah2 nangis... asyik nangis jer... mngkin kali nie, aku kna tabh.. mngkin bukan untuk dia jer.. tapi untuk aku... sbb aku kna sedia untuk menghadpi masa akn datang... aku tak bleh tros2san mcm nie... anti sng jer owang pjak kpala aku... aku syang dia.. amat sayng.. dia fahm atau tak, bukan msalah aku... maslah dia... nak kata kecik, dah besar... pandai2 lah....

aku!!

once again, i cry becoz of someone else... why i can't be juz like he want??? why???!!! the answer is
1!!! becoz, i want to be myself.. that's all... aku tak nak tros-trosan owang pndang aku rendah!! aku pn ada maruah dan harga diri!! takkn nak nangis jer sntiasa! tapi, nak wat cmner.. bnda tu jer yang aku mmpu bwat... aku tak der keistimewaan dalam diri aku!! takn tak reti2 nak nmpak!!! aku tak bleh jadi macm adik aku.. pandai, cantik, sgalnya ada!! itu ker yang dia nak??!!! "Wake up UMI ANIS ADILAH!!!! stop doing something juz to satisfied other people..." 2 kata hati aku.. hakikatnya... aku tak bleh.. aku kna wat mcm 2.. itu jer cra untuk owang nak dkat ngan aku... mama cakap, stop thinking about others and start think about yourself!! tapi tak bleh.. aku dah biasa.. pada aku, bahagiakan owang len, bleh bwat kita bahagia... kalo dia bahagia mcm 2, aku ekot.... aku juga akan bahagia.. walau hakikatnya...... erm.. insyaALLAH mngkin kita merana skang, dkat akhirat, kita bhagia.. sper tau kan??

i'm here...

i'm waiting for an answer.. an answer for all question that played in my mind.. will i go back to that place?? i hope so.. i want to see them,, with a new spirit.. and a new friend... my whole life was being possessed by jealousy when i see them together... with my family and him, behind me, i know i can get up once again to continue the journey... i know i can do it... my father said that i had the potential... i still dont see....

mlm....

Entah kenapa.. malm nie aku tak dpat nyenyak... aku cuba nak tdow.. tapi.. slagi aku tak dgar suara dia.. aku tak bleh.. entahlah... dia slalu uji aku pnya kesabaran.. aku kna sabar dgn apa yang dia bwat.. sbb dgn 2 jer yang bleh aku bwat utk aku fhm dia.. kalo antara kami takder kfahamn, jwapnya.. lingkup hbngan... dia prnah ckap... dia dpat rasa yang kami takkn kekal... aku menangis.. aku tak mengharapkan itu dari dia.. aku tau ada bnda dia rhsiakn dari aku... aku tak tau apa.... aku tak suker owang berahsia dari aku.. tapi nak wat cmner.. dah dia mmg cm2.. trima jerlah... dah bnyak sngt yang dia tlng aku.. dia than jer semua karenah aku.. dgl aku.. semua dia trima jer.. dia tak pernah merungut... sekli pn tak... takkn aku tak bleh bwat bnda yang smer... saya syang awak.. tlnglah fhm!!!!

i'm trying,,,

It have been a couple of night i'm crying for someone... i don;t know whether its worth or not..
i'm juz cry and cry to make me fell more better than ever.. tapi.. aku asyik tnya dri aku.. sampai bila aku nk kna buang air mata hnya utk dia??? dia fhm ker?? dia msh lagi ker nak dengr semua maslah aku?? tak bosn ker dia??? tak rasa terbeban ker??? bila kau tnya semua nie, dia ckap 'tak'... tapi sjak akhir nie, slalu sngt buat aku mcm2... susah untk aku percya kalo dia ada owang len... entahlah... aku syang dia.. tapi aku tak tau plak dia mcm mana... bila kau tnya, dia syang aku ker tak, dia jawap 'ye'... tapi sjauh mana, aku tak tau.. skang nie plak pnuh ngn dilema nak bljar lagi.. argh!!!!!!!!!!! semak kpala otak aku... lpas satu maslh pergi, dtng plak masalah len... tapi,.. bila aku rasa nak nak nagis, aku lebih rela air mta aku tumpah atas tikar sejadah smabil pohon keampunan dri ALLAH... malahn, aku lebih tenang bila aku menumpahkan segala kekecewaan aku pada ALLAH... setiap ahri, aku tak pernah lupa untuk aku doa supaya dipanjangkan jodoh antara aku dgn dia... tapi.. entahlah... masih di awang-awangn... aku kena kuat.. kalo aku tak kuat, mcm mana aku nk tmpuh dugaan yang lbh hebat dari nie??? aku kna jgak tabh!!!!!!!

sahabat atau.......

Thaknxx sbb slalu gmbirakan saya...
Thankxx sbb suport sya...

eeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KO ENGAT KO BGOS SGT KER??!!!! PGLAH MAM!!!! NAK PERLI2 AKU PLAK... U THINK THAT U GOOD EH????!!!! BENGANG PLAK AKU NGN MANUSIA MCM NIE... WHY MUST PEOPLE WILL NEVER SATISFIED TO OTHERS??? IT'S MY RIGHT TO WRITE WHATEVER THAT I WANT!!! AND U WILL NEVER HAD THE RIGHT TO SAID ANYTHING ABOUT IT!!!! DAK2 KAT CITU GALAK JER BLER DIA CKP MCM APA YANG AKU TULIS DALM FB!!!!`ENTAHLAH... TAK PUAS2 AGY AGKNYA NAK SKTKAN AT AKU NIE... LANTAK LAH!!! GO DAMN TO HELL!!!! ERM.... SABAR UMIE!!!! SABAR!!!!!!!

RERAYA....

Raya akhirnya menjelang... dan aku tak dpat update blog aku tepat pada masanya.. broadband buat hal... bngang tol lah... erm... raya tahun nie, taklah sebest yang aku sngka... duet raya pn.. ala kadar jer.. tapi alhamdulillah.. aku msih lagi dpat braya dgn insan yang aku sayang... kernduan aku pada kawan2 membibitkan rasa yang syahdu.. dikala takbir bergema, air mata nie jatuh... abah tak dpat beraya sngat ngn kitowang.. pnggilan kerjaya memanggilnya.. aku tak dapat menghalang.. perasaan brcmpur baur traya tahun nie... sedih, marah, sunyi... smua lah adaa... kami sekeluarga msih lagi dapat pkai baju raya yang bru tahun nie... ucpan syukur yang tak henti2 aku ucapkan... aku pkai kebaya raya pertama nie... pergh!!!! pnyalah panas.. tapi cantik.. hahahahahaha.. anti tgk gmbar aku kat fb...

URGH!!!!!!!!!

Apa nak tulis ek??? takder idea siot mlm nie... bosan gler sey!!! erm.. aku nie smbil2 2lis tgk cter anak rintih... btapa trsiksnya hidup bila tiada pedoman dn juga dorongan.... bukan senang nak jadi orang yang berguna.. tapi perkara 2 tak mustahil... apabila seorang gadis terlanjur, yang akan menjadi tempat luahan adalah parents.. tapi dlm cter nie, ayah dia mcm prngai mcm @&^$.. dia bleh tgk jer gadis tu than skit nak brsalin.. mak bdk nie dh meninggal.. mungkin sbb marah yang trmat sngt mmbuatkan ayah gdis nie brtndak demikian... bla bdk nie nie dh bsar, dia tak tau apa itu hormat.. dgn bapak dia sndiri bleh ckap "aku" "kau"... tapi kan.. yelah.. mcm mana pn anak branak gdoh.. takkn ptos air dicncang... mcm mana bnci pn kita ngn mak ayah, dia still mak ayah kita... rasa hormat takkan hilang kalo mereka masih digelar mak dan ayah...

I THINK THAT'S ALL... BUT ACTUALLY I DON'T KNOW THE END OF THE STORY... BUT I WAS HOPING THE END WILL BE GREAT... TRUST ME.. THE MORALE OF THIS STORY CAN MAKE US CHANGED TO A BETTER PERSON!!!!

waiting!!!

Well it is near to syawal... GOSH!!!! i can't wait... to meet someone that i miss.. to wear new cloth.. well for this year, i bought 1 kebaya n others will be baju kurung.. unluckly... this year i had miss about 3 days of fasting... fever!!!! erm... maybe because i miss my fren damn much... or maybe... to tired of the house chores.. hahahaha!! so what?! i/m a gurl.. and that is what gurls do.. the best ramadhan that i ever had when i was in standard school... with the cousins, with the jewelery... juz like a princess... when i think af that, the tears came down... again cry and cry and cry..... erm...

Ok.. no more ideas.... juz want to wish...

SELAMAT ARI RAYA!!!!

heroin of dfsm...

cun kan gurlz dfsm???
nielah kawan sehidup n semati aku...
smpai akhirat dowang kawan aku... sayang korang..
muuuuuaaahhh!!!!

heroes of dfsm...

ada yang takder dlm nie...
en. fariss....
nie lah hero malaya dfsm...

more story,....

I juz came back from 'berbuka pose' at Rawang...
so damn tired plus i'm having my asthma attack this morning...
when i read others people blog, seeing them with their own partner..
make me jealous.. why must i have that kind of feeling???
why must i hate to see their happiness??
is this becoz i don't have what they have??
or becoz i love the person who had their soulmate??
i don't know the answer...

Well... life must go on no matter what...
i'm happy to see the person that i love, happy...
LOVE.. means letting the person that we want go...
to catch their own happiness...
and that's what i do...
what can I say,
they such a nice couple....
i'm happy for them....
really happy..

Am i doing some sacrifice here???
HURM....
maybe... and maybe not...

TO HATE MEANS TO MISS,
TO UPSET MEANS TO LOVE,
TO LOVE MEANS TO LEAVE,
AND....
TO LEAVE MEANS TO CARRY ON....

how times fly...

OLD TIMES....



hey... its me..
aku tak engt lah plak time nie umo bper...
yang pnting waktu nie,
aku hnya akn fikir men, sronok.. tkder msalah...
tapi bla dah bsar..
smua kna fkir...
kan bez kalo dpat blik ke zaman kcik nie....
comel tak????

p/s: dak2 dfsm... teka umie yang mana???? komen k anti.,,,,

hAH!!!!!!

This is my lovely parents... romantic aren't they??

they always give some support no matter what,
DAD... thankxx for being there when i cry
and need some hugs..
MAMA... thankxx for gave birth for me...
and for all the cooks that u made..
it is the bez of the bez...




this is my siblings...
tuhan jer tau mcm mana naklnyer downg nie..
tapi aku tak kisah...
dowang lah sgalnya bg aku...
thankxxx guys for making my live more complete....


LOVE U GUYS...
AS ALWAYS....

Pabila mentari terbenam,
Ketika itulah pelbagai perkara yang akan berubah,
Ketenangan yang dialami,
Membuatkan aku hampir menitiskan airmata,
Kekesalan yang dihamburkan,
Kerinduan yang dipendam,
Kadang-kadang menjadi dendam yang mendalam,
Perlukah aku melepaskan dendam itu?
Atau aku hanya perlu berdiam dan menunggu ia hilang??
Persoalan yang takkan ada jawapannya...
Pertanyaan yang takkan pernah ada penyelesaian..

Aku berbisik pada angin...
Aku mengadu pada ombak...
Tapi tiada balasan yang kuterima..
DAN...
Akhirnya aku berserah pada ALLAH..
Ketenangan yang hilang,
Mula muncul kembali,
Diri yang lesap,
Perlahan-lahan menampakkan bayangnya..
Alhamdulillah...

MY LIGHT.....

THE TALLEST BOY IN OUR CLASS..

When it comes to presentation.. he want to show himself into that... to tell u frankly... AKMAL... u can be a great presenters... u juz have to practice it... remember.. practice makes perfect dear... hahahahahaha.... actually he don't like taking pictures... that's why.. it is damn hard for me to find the pic.... sory mal... i hve to take your pic in fb... sowy....

PRESENTING... THE MOST SILENCE BOY IN CLASS... THIS AWARD I WOULD LIKE TO GIVE TO....

Ok... it's quite annoying... sory... this sweet man named HAFIZ... but we called him ABE... actually the nickname we gave him bcoz he came from kelantan... well... he is quite most of the time... always being bullied by stiflers brother... pity him.. miss your sweet smile darl...

THIS IS MY SOUL FRIEND.....

The one next to me is the one that i miss so much... We were in a same room for the last semester... we having a great time together... yes i admit.... sometimes we were having a hard time... but its normal... we hare our secret... we share the food... we still having 'we' whether the hard time or the happy time... she really2 understand me... she knows how to make me laugh....she knows what i want in my life.... she knows what type of guys that i want... she knows everything.. she is my gurl... she is IZAH....





I'M ASKING FOR A CATERER AND HERE SHE COME!!!!!!

What can i tell about AYU.... well... she nice... we always share our experience about cooking.... in the kitchen... we having a great time together.... we knows about the cutting before the kids know... she really
nice...




This gurl quite hard for me to describe her... sometimes she can be silent as possible... sometimes she not... what i know about her is... she loves korean movies and sushi... HANA.... what i can say is... to be a better person is... u have to friend with them.... and u will not lost anything if u say sory dear...





A PIOUS GURL.. KIND OF......

When we been separate... she is the only gurl that remind me of solat... she loves to sing.... sometimes when i sing and old song... she will continued it... AISYAH... it is hard for me to find you pictures with the others... i know that u don't like of taking picture... sory.. i had to take it.... oh yeah... GUD LUCK WITH THE SHADOW DEAR....






LOOKS LIKE MACHO???? WELL LOOK AGAIN!!!!!

The one with the shawl... use to be my great friend.. really great friend... he use to be my shoulder to cry.. he understand me a lot... but.. i took it for granted.. he juz to good for me... well rite now he have someone to loved.... so.. i'm happy for him... FAHMIE... Thankxx for everything...

FARISS.... what i love about him is... his dialect... the way he laugh.... there is something about him... juz i don't know what it is... well... u guys got to tell me....

The chief of the class... a responsible person.... a gud fren also.. the one we can depend on... he is LUQMAN or known as LUKE....

continue...

This cute gurl named MOON... she is happy go lucky... i think she is the smallest in dfsm class... sometimes she can be unpredictable... why is that??? well i got to ask her 4 that.. hahahaha.. she is 'masok air' kadang2... yup.. totally....

Next to her is my ex-roomate... same like fie.. she also had the gift.. genius... she knows how to talk and write in eglish very well... good in any subject... including marketing.... she great... n i juz know that she is afraid of the shadow... (i think u know what am i talking about)... MIZAH... beware of that shadow.....

THIS IS THE GOSSIP GURL... HEHEHEHEHE...
LETS GO FOR THE FIRST ONE.....

TIKAH... She is like an eldest sister... love to give a motivation to others so that they will not lost...

A gurl that loves to be massage by me... her body way to spoil.... (sikit2 msok angin.. mnja sngt) she loves to be dressing around.. remember gurls... DO NOT GIVE YOUR NUMBER.... hahahaha....

Loves to smile, likes to laugh, don't care about others... mind her own business... what i adore about her is... her voice... its cute... i miss it... she is MIMIEY.....

When i need someone to hug me, when i burst out tears, when i need some support, when i miss my mom... she can be the bez... (jgn pkir umie tak engt korang k) she knows how to calm me down... FAIRUZ... i miss your hug....

MAKE WAY FOR THE GORGEOUS GURLS....

The gurl with the orange hijab... love to call her as AEYNILL she is damn gud in matching the colours.. n she is creative guys.... i was once warn by her bcoz wearing wrong colours... she juz like a nanny sometimes..

FIE... the one at the centre... she is way to genius... she knows about everything... the thing that i don't know.. loves to explore something... she don't care about people talking about her.. to her.. the bez person is to believe in yourself... she can be really gud in presentation and believe me.. u will need him to be in your group bcoz she can be as creative as possible... plus she's a good presenter...

Lets talk about a talkative lady... MIERA... This gurl loves to look pretty... she is full of face reaction... she loves to pick a fight with me... likes to tease the others gurl... i like the way when she whinning.... so... cute...... hahahahahha...

ALRITE!!!!!!! THIS THE LIGHT OF DFSM...

The one with looks like a chinese.. i prefer to call him ZACK... Gud looking, funny n a kind of romantic person.. hahahahaha....

The one in centre.. he is really gud in taking pictures and edit it, sometimes he can be way to cheeky but his nice... besides fie.. he is also a good presenter.. president of dfsm.. HAKIM..

Next to hakim... this guy love to use his body gesture..
love to use the showmanship.. juz like 'PAK MAUN'. We called him ZARIF or MAT RIP..

..continued..

GIRLZZZZ!!!!!!!!

Alrite!!!!! ATTENTION!!!!!!!!!!!

girls!!!! knapa nie... knapa msti ada prgaduhan??!!??? listen here... korang tak ramai... so, bla tak ramai, supposely tak der masalah.. but, i'm totaly wrong! you guys are being separated... okay.. maybe noat separated at all, but i know, there is one gurl that made a mistake, so what?? forgive her...

ok... i know its hard for u to forgive her.. but, she's a human... everyone make a mistake.. including me.. sdah2 lah tu... tak pnat ker??? lagi satu, mulut kna jga.. jgn terlmpau straight to the point...

tak semua mnusia bleh terima.. kna dngan orang yang pnyabar, u're safe... but kalo sbliknya, u are DEAD.... if u want to be safe, protect each other, stay together no matter what... if u want to win in all situation, u have to work together... fighting can't solve everything.... sometimes, in a girls relatinshp that we call FRIENDS.... we need trust n loyal...

1 FOR ALL N ALL FOR 1... LOVE U GUYS....